“ I have to let you go, son, I am so sorry. Society won’t accept us if I accept you.” Kunti cried at the banks of the river Ganga, unable to separate herself from her son. The pain of drowning her son was unbearable. She bent and kissed her son for the last time and caressed him. She erupted as the child was carried over by the waves of the Ganga. Her sorrow and pain knew no bound. A mother was sacrificing her son, leaving him when she was supposed to love and nurture him. She could never forget the crying son with gold armor, floating away from her.
Kunti gently opened her eyes and wiped her tears. “ Son forgive me.” cried Kunti on the dark night on the battleground of Kurukshetra begging the lives of her sons from their brother. “Come back to us. Leave the side of Duryodhan, the side of Adharma.”
“I cannot leave him. He was there for me when all of you denied accepting me,” stated Karna, resisting his tears from erupting and his heart from rushing to embrace his mother.
“You are my son- Kunti putra. You are the eldest of the Pandavas. They would accept you. Will it be possible for you to shoot arrows at your own brothers? Could you pierce the heart of your younger brothers and be the cause of their end? Come back, Son. Come and join your brothers and fight for the Dharma, Karna”
“I cannot Mata. I remember when the world denied accepting me for my birth, Duryodhan accepted me for my skills. And all he asked for in return was my endless friendship with him. Is there any way I can deny it? I am Radhey- the son of Radha, the mother who nurtured me, who loved me limitlessly though I was not her own son. You, you never accepted your own son Mata. Is this what you call Dharma? When the world mocked me for being Sutputra( son of a chariot driver) you did not step ahead to protect your son. Is this what you call Dharma or is Dharma you coming to your son, accepting him only when you know your Pandavas would die.”
“ Son, I could not accept you. I was locked with the chains of society. A son of an unmarried woman would never be accepted. You would have not been accepted. I am selfish. I did come to you when I needed you but know that each time you came in front of me, I wanted to break all chains of society and embrace you. Each time you touched my feet, my heart erupted with regret. Each time you were insulted, it was like a sword piercing my heart, son. I suffered every time you suffered. I am sorry son, you suffered because of me.” Kunti folded her hands as she begged acceptance and love from her son. The grief, regret, and pain of separation that was held in her tender heart for years erupted all at once. Karna could not control his tears either. He moved and held his mother’s hand and cried.
“ And so am I bound in the chains of a promise. It is too late now.”
“Why are you supporting Duryodhan? He is Adharmi. He has always been. Your one choice can stop the war my son. It can save the lives of thousands. It can establish Dharma. You would rule the entire kingdom of Hastinapur.”
“ Duryodhan is adharmic, but for once in his life, he did something that the greatest warriors and preservers of Dharma failed to do. Diluting all the borders of caste and birth, he encouraged skills. He gave me a chance to demonstrate my skills and prove myself when warriors such as Bhishma and Drona failed to look beyond the caste. When you failed to accept your son, he did”
“Son, please do not support him. This promise of yours would mark you as Adharmi. You would be performing a great sin in fighting against the Dharma. Do not let this promise of yours lure upon you as a curse. ”
” Curse lured upon me since the moment you abandoned me. The curse of suffering. All my life I have craved for acceptance Mata, and if I deny Duryodhan my loyalty, I would be Adharmi in my own eyes by breaking a promise.” Karna turned his back towards his mother and walked away. Each cell of his body resisted his movements, resisted his steps away from his mother but he had to.
” Mata, you have always been known as the mother of the 5 Pandavas, and I promise that your 5 sons would live. I won’t attack Yudhishthir, Bheem, Sahdev, and Nakul. Either it is me dying or Arjun. And either way, you would have your 5 sons alive. I will fight my younger brother, even if it makes me Adharmi. I will fight for Duryodhan, even if it curses me. Though the power to end the war lies in my hand, I deny your acceptance and love. I am consciously aware that what he desires isn’t right and his intentions are completely wrong but would it be right if I break a forever promise? I feel cursed for my life and this curse is a forever one. A curse that would leave behind a false identity of me for ages to come. A curse that would mark me Adharmi but I would die being a tragic hero. A cursed hero.” Karna turned towards his mother. Kunti knew he had cried, his eyes were red and teary. She took a deep breath and breaking all the chains of the society that held her back for so long stepped towards Karna. She wiped his tears and said, ” Will you ever forgive me, son?”
” How long can a son be separated from his mother? How long will I be able to not forgive you, Mata? I am known in the world for my charity, and I don’t let anyone return without their wishes being granted.” He smiled faintly and said” I have already donated my divine armor to Arjun’s father- Indra Dev and now I would do so to his mother. I forgive you Mata and I promise that your 5 Pandavas would live. Only time will tell, either it is me or Arjun.” Karna bent and touched the feet of Kunti. She gently held him up and embraced him.
‘Only if I would had dared to accept him. Only if I would have dared to protect him when the world mocked him. Only if I would have been courageous to face the society, had my child not suffered so much. If I hadn’t been under the veil of the society and under the fear of denial, I could have prevented the greatest war of history. I could have prevented the death of my son. It was because of me that he suffered. Only if I would have dared to embrace him earlier.’ thought Kunti as she embraced his son and cried.
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